Most of my blog friends know that my college friend for 20 years now, Christina died in August.
She was a very strong Christian and a longtime friend from college.
She was not a butterfly and rainbow type girl. More like a Redskin fan
waving around the finger and singing to U2 type. She prepared in
advance a letter and present for her son's birthday in October and left
a note stating whenever you see rainbows or yellow butterflies think of
me. Several of her friends had noticed butterflies around more than
usual or had been drawn to butterflies in some way before knowing of
this note.
Our new house has peonies galore along the long sidewalk up to the house. We have swarms of butterflies there daily.
Yesterday
when I walked out there at dusk when all butterflies are normally gone.
There was a butterfly still clinging to a peony almost at mid-chest
level. I looked to see if it was still alive as the wings were closed
up and it was not moving. I did not touch the wings but put my finger
up to its legs and it crawled on my finger and stayed there for
awhile. All that I could think of is that Christina was there for me
knowing that I was missing my husband and it was her way of letting me
know. I have never held a butterfly before and it was kind of an
awesome feeling. especially knowing the story of her letter...........
Summertime=Dirty kids
I look at my two littles and within 10/15 minutes of being clean, they look like it has been 24 hours since they have been bathed. Even getting in and out of the pool, this GA sand mixed dirt clings and is rather dark. Not the normal brown up north almost a dry potting soil dark. that my littlest loves to dig in.....she loves to feel the soil on her hands. A future gardener, perhaps? Then snacks, oh my.... popsicle stains, koolaid mustaches,watermelon, pudding, ketchup.......you name it whatever it is they have eaten appears all over their little faces and on their clothes. Danielle has started pulling on Zoe's long hair.....my guess is she likes running her hands through it but when sticky it only makes a royal mess. Several times a day Zoe yells for help for me to tell The baby to let go. My 3 yr old needs her hair washed about three times a day, thank goodness she loves the water and baths.....one of those times I just dunk her in the pool to her delight...which helps. It is a vicious cycle it seems. Summertime and dirty kids. Oh well, my attempt is there. Although to others it may look like I gave in a week ago, I promise it was only a matter of moments!!!!
I asked Kendra to bring down her dirty laundry.......it seems the dog got a hold of a dirty diaper and destroyed it on top of the laundry I sent her up with 3 days ago to put away and now it all needs washed again. Dumb Dog....how gross can you be? What were you thinking???? yuck, Yuck, YUCK.
So, no beach for us today.............I will be working on LAUNDRY!
This has been a very hard deployment, my moods have swung from up to down fairly quickly. Out of the three this is the hardest, we have added a child with each deployment and let me tell you.... Single parenting is a full time job. Sometimes I think working would be easier. No breaks from the kiddos happen when you are with them all the time. With three and homeschooling my housework seems to have taken a backseat. When is there time for that. I try to put things away but forget laundry. I HATE IT. I do not mind washing it and folding it is not so bad but it never gets put away. I tend to waste about two hours a day. Nothing gets done and I lose grip on the house at this time. From 1130-130, I wait on my hubby online. He expects it and our day can not really start until then. My girls are night owls so I let them sleep until about 930-10 on a regular day. My oldest learns best at night....she does not function well during the mornings at all. So after he gets off then the day begins.
I feel so much better being out in the sun, walking in the sand. We are in GA there is no GRASS. Weeds that pass as grass with burrs but no lush green grass to sink your toes in and feel the coolness. I love the beach and the sound of the ocean. To walk by it and view the vastness of it all. To imagine God creating all of it and all the wonders of the ocean. Things known and unknown. That he created the Sun that warms my inner being. The sun seems to help lift me out of my funk. I just miss my hubby and am overwhelmed by the kids, the mess.........the responsiblities these days. 15 months is a long time to be deployed. His R and R is coming up and I can not wait. Have you ever had one of those days (especially if married) that you can not wait to see your spouses face walk through the door for a hug, a word of encouragement or simply to delight in their presence cause you have had a rough day? That is how I feel.
But it will be a while until that relief happens.
so today after 1 you will find us outside enjoying the sun................
We had a crazy week last week. Kendra, my 10 yr old broke her foot on Thursday and we were dealing with that. and just a ton of other little things piled up and started overwhelming me. To the point of not being able to do anything.......I sat on a chair and played with the girls reading them books and singing songs, but allowed the house to fall apart. Overwhelmed on where to start cleaning, I would finish a room start on the next and carted things back and forth from room to room messing back up the first. I stopped for Angel Food distribution......... about 1 o'clock Kendra fell at church........her crutches or rather one crutch got stuck in the door and did not swing when she did and she went down. Not a good thing at all. Mr. Arlie lifted the poor girl into a chair and we decided to go be loved on as I needed some help. So by 130 we had run home, packed a overnight bag and took off. We enjoyed great fellowship that night with a bunch of friends at our former church. We participated in their baby day celebration the next morning......helped Isabella celebrate her 3rd birthday at Golden Corral, went shopping at Goody's (going out of business sale) went to see Prince Caspian movie (Zoe stayed with Arlie and Sarah) and ended up home after everything about 915pm on Sunday. I needed that, the kiddos needed that.....and wish it could happen more often. Being away from family is awful......as not everyone can help out with the little things when so far away. I needed a slight reprieve.....less responsibilities for just a few hours. I feel so much better today although walking into the house was like a cold splash of water to the face!
I was never much into this either until I heard of her letter to her son..........then experienced it for myself.... read more
on Jerri’s afterthoughts